“I decided to be the Christian Scientist that I really was while participating in this community choir”

At Association several years ago you said that the next important step of progress for mankind was to learn to work together. Since hearing that statement, everything in my personal life and in the world at large has convinced me of the truth of those words.

For six years I have been a member of a black gospel choir. Last Christmas we put on a truly inspiring musical program that was pervaded by the Holy Spirit. Despite this success, when we resumed rehearsals in January, animal magnetism engaged in a concerted effort to dismantle everything good, holy, and unifying that had been accomplished. The main weapon in this attack was nothing but plain old personal sense. Mortal thinking disguised itself in the cloak of personal preferences, complaints, “constructive” criticism, and personal defenses to these issues. All this seemed inconceivable to me in the face of the rare spiritual accomplishment of our concert!

Our amazing director, a mere sophomore in college, was also affected by animal magnetism’s attack. He was officially “talked to” about the complaints, and began to change his teaching approach. Rehearsals became joyless, corrective musical exercises that no one enjoyed. The tone of Christian love, joy, and fellowship quickly disappeared.

To my dismay, this attack also mesmerized me by stirring up latent concerns. Because of the director’s huge talent, I had kept a beady eye out for any hint that the choir might become a vehicle for diva-like egotism. I suspected him of “mad ambition.” By the fourth rehearsal, these mental suggestions had made me miserable. When rehearsal ended, I stormed out of the building, not staying to chat with friends as I had always done before.

Later when I was at home and in prayer, I realized that it was I who had played the diva by storming out of rehearsal. How devious mortal thinking is! A transformation was needed, beginning in my thought. In prayer, the gentle, still small voice directed me to exercise Christian love, patience, understanding, diplomacy, and helpfulness instead of criticism and useless complaint. What was really needed was to apply the lessons and structure of Church to this activity. I decided to be the Christian Scientist that I really was while participating in this community choir.

Soon a friend in the choir left me messages saying she wanted to talk about our last rehearsal. I knew what was coming, so I spent the morning in prayer before returning her call. When I spoke with my friend, instead of indulging in gossip or destructive criticism, I strove to foster appreciation for our director and one another and to value our achievements. As a result, my friend and I had a very long, healing conversation that fostered love, brought clarity and insight, and drew us together.

That night at rehearsal, our director revealed that after much struggle and prayer, he was now convinced that he had been called to preach. Wow! While everyone had been expecting this young talent to become a musical star and I had mentally accused him of “mad ambition,” he had been engaged in the humble struggle of a spiritual calling. He then invited the entire choir to attend his first sermon. At first I was concerned that his sermon might contain a stiff dose of Christian fundamentalism. After much prayer, I attended the event, knowing I could trust good.

The event was in reality a privileged invitation to witness an ordination. When our director stepped forward to preach, the first thing he said was, “God is good.” He then delivered an inspiring and courageous sermon aimed at healing escalating tensions resulting from a tragic incident involving a white police officer and a young black man. In his sermon, our director discussed John Newton, the author of “Amazing Grace,” a former slave trader whose deliverance from a storm at sea had caused him to repent of his evil trafficking in human lives and eventually to become an Anglican minister. Our director affirmed that Newton’s redemption proved that anyone could be saved. At the end of the service, he introduced two white police officers who would be directing traffic. The event ended with the affirmation, “This is how you build community.” I would add, “This is how you heal!”

In retrospect, it is astonishing how at one point, everything in me wanted to give up and let go of all that had been good, inspiring, unifying, and ultimately healing. But the minute I turned to God in prayer, the seemingly overpowering grasp of negativity and destructive thought disappeared. Disharmony and disunity were replaced with harmony, brotherhood, unity, and healing. Without prayer and God’s answer to it, I never would have made it through every step along the way of this major learning experience.