“…a transformation in my thinking had taken place”

Rereading the Century book made me realize how practical Christian Science is and how it can be applied in various situations to ameliorate the idea that matter (material conditions) are the last word. The testimonies still hold the impact of real evidence as if they were written today. By reading these testimonies I was impelled to look back on testimonies that I had written down. One stood out very clearly that the practice of Christian Science is healing Truth.

An email written to you and your reply were the underlying recognition of healing. Ten years ago, when it appeared I was very low and without help of any kind, I was raising my daughter alone and had lost my full-time job and was about to lose a house I owned. It had been rented, and the tenants trashed the place, stealing all the copper piping and not paying the rent for several months. I had no money for the repairs, and I was unable to rent it and pay the mortgage. My daughter’s junior year spring term was about to begin, and I didn’t have the money for tuition.

I wrote these words to you. “I want to be like Joseph (faithful), but it is so difficult with everything falling down around me. My house…will be lost next month for lack of funds and I have been unable to pay for my daughter’s junior spring semester. My consciousness gets lifted when I do the lesson and listen to healing tapes, but I just can’t seem to maintain that higher thought when my family is feeling sorry for me, debt collectors are calling and all I get is ‘no’ from employers I am contacting.”

Your response was loud and clear! You wrote,

“Was thinking that the first step in every challenge is pretty important and that involves getting out of the way of what God is doing. Getting in the way involves rehearsing the terrible situation, adding up the darkness instead of counting on light, considering ‘last straws’ and going ahead fearing as much as one wants. It may also include not really changing what every spiritual sense and spiritual intuition indicates needs to be changed. The next step is be as conscious as possible of the fact that your need isn’t to bring into being something that doesn’t exist. It is to see more what does exist. That means not outlining what needs to happen in order for things to be okay but instead seeing and listening and feeling more of God’s present rightness and goodness literally, and all things working together for good.”

Your words helped me to change the way I was thinking about my life, which had been as if it was separate from God, and I knew that to be untrue. I really couldn’t be separate if God was all. I turned my thought to all the good I had witnessed (another healing concerning an immediately changed circumstance) and applied that healing and others, to my thinking about my current situation. Just as I am doing with rereading A Century of Christian Science Healing.

In looking back over these past 10-years, I can see how much I have relied on Christian Science practice as my primary support, though I’ve had spiritual support from friends. I did not lose the house; it was repaired, made possible by a loving loan from an unexpected source. My daughter graduated college, including a term abroad and recently married. And I completed my Master’s and have had two excellent positions, one which I continue to work in today.

Looking back helped me to understand the present better through a newer viewpoint. I realize now that a transformation in my thinking had taken place and was expressed in my experience of abundant blessing not only for me, but those who received what was rightfully theirs.

Each healing in A Century of Christian Science Healing is unique, but the healing on pages 213 -216 struck a chord especially because of where I am in my experience now. Just like the writer, I am wondering what my purpose is or am I just drifting through the final years of my material existence. I am seriously praying to understand God’s present purpose for me.

The writer’s words in the final paragraph of his contribution spoke to me, “I think probably the most outstanding feature of it all was that prior to this experience I felt I was just sort of drifting, and rather useless. I wasn’t quite sure what my purpose in life was; I felt that all my experiences were superficial. I was doing some interesting work, but it wasn’t satisfying.” These types of feelings are what I am currently struggling with. However, his words have helped me realize that I, too, have an opportunity every minute of every day to see myself and my fellow man in the true light. And I could have the experience the writer described: “This not only contributed to my own wellbeing, but I was able to bring it to others, which was more important.” This demonstration, which took place years ago, is so meaningful. The writer’s contribution of well-being to himself and others is very much like what you said in Class. We are not working for ourselves, but for the ages!

While not a healing per se, but a heading in the book on, “The Healing of The Nations,” (p. 249) is consistent with these ideas of working on identity of self and for others. The writer quotes Revelation (22:2) “the leaves of the tree are for the healing of the nations.” I love how the writer associates this statement with life: “Christian healing must necessarily extend to the collective aspects of living. But the deepest spiritual intuitions of mankind have always pointed to the fact that it must start with individual regeneration.” I feel we, as Christian Science healers, are not only working for religious reform (a Christianity more closely related to Jesus’ own life) but also for the greater purpose of a more spiritual life for all; I believe that was Mrs. Eddy’s wish for all mankind. If I can apply this all-inclusive thinking in my daily work I believe my purpose will become clear and certainly great growth in Christian Science will appear.