On My Own, Not Alone

Back in September, I was feeling pretty desperate. We had been almost ready to put our house on the market when hurricane Sandy hit in 2012.  It took four years to finish fixing all the (thankfully minor) damage.  After a year on the market, we finally had buyers, who assured us they could close at the end of August.  We weren’t so sure of that, so we arranged to close on a house at the end of September.  By mid-September, it seemed that that wouldn’t happen either.

It wasn’t that I wasn’t praying and working hard metaphysically, but my sense of peace each time I found it, turned out to be fragile and easily broken.  At this point I sent you a couple of emails.  After all, when the going gets tough, go to your teacher, right?  An email exchange with Bree brought the information that you weren’t available.

What? No Skip! Now what do I do?  What I did first was realize how loving and warm Bree’s message was.  I felt hugged.  I wasn’t alone at all.  That broke the mesmerism,  I realized that my Teacher – the Bible and Science and Health – are always with me.

I began to look back through the citations I’d been working with.  By this time I had quite a collection.  The ones that really stood out were about trust.  I organized those into a set of readings (I was scheduled for a Wednesday evening in a few weeks.)

By the time that Wednesday arrived, the end of September had come and gone, along with our deposit on the house we didn’t buy. Yet I felt buoyant! I finally had an understanding of what “self-reliant trustworthiness” (S&H 23:27) is. And after the service my husband asked if he could borrow the books for a few days to study the citations.

The change in our outlook brought about change in our situation. We realized that we had options we’d never considered before. As we explored those, our sense of trust deepened. We were being guided into new ways of thinking humanly and spiritually,

In early November, we had the opportunity to attend a Christian Science lecture given by a friend and fellow Association member.  Her subject was freedom and, oh, how it spoke to me!  It was what I needed to complete claiming my freedom from limitation, from being constrained to stay somewhere that I didn’t want to be.

Two days later we received the news that our buyers’ house was under contract and they could move forward with buying ours.  We did some house hunting and found one even better suited to us than the one we didn’t buy.  We’ll be moving in mid-February ready for our next great adventure.

I doubt that you often receive a thank you note for not being available. The lessons I learned, the growth and support I found along the way are invaluable gifts. Thank you.